Lost

I spend my nights

Trying to get lost. 

Thinking maybe if I close my eyes

I won't be here. 

I get so tangled

Wrapped up in thoughts 

I might just disappear. 

If you don't want to give yourself to me

That's fine. 

But don't try to take anymore of me 

And What's mine. 

In the quiet is where

Things make sense.

Calm water clears 

And you can see everything underneath the surface. 

But I'm trying to stay present

Not for you, not for me, but for them.

But that's really hard when I don't want to be here.

I just want to be lost.