Que Sara Sara

I kind of have the attitude that you do the planning and hard work and if It's blessed by God then things will happen. I always have. It helps me stop being anxious about big decisions. I make the step forward and he does or he doesn't and either way I'm ok.
Lately I've been getting this thing like restless leg syndrome only for your brain. Lord only knows what is coming, but i think some change is in the wind. And to be honest I'm ok with it. Change is inevitable and whenever it happens we have an opportunity to accept it and rejoice, or be anxious and worry. I prefer the first.
I try to make good decisions. I almost see decisions like a roulette wheel sometimes, things that should be logically good aren't because it really wasn't time or it really wasn't the right place, so it ends up not turning out like the math says it should.
I wonder about myself, if sometimes my attempts at good are turned rotten on the vine because I let things get to me and can't hold on and carry through. I wonder about why I am the way I am, I don't like a lot of things about myself, but are we doomed to be products of our raising?
I think there is hope for us yet.