Unforgiving
Somedays I feel very unforgiving. Maybe it's because things are just that fresh.
Blogs aren't about sounding just right. They're not about fitting in with what people expect of you, or about having "social graces", they're just about being honest with yourself and allowing other people some insight into your thought processes. And even now explaining this I'm talking to myself.
I don't know about everyone else, I just know about me. Everyone has their reasons or explanations for why they do things they way they do, or feel the way they do; some might even call them excuses. And I have mine. I'm not always very aware of the why's, for myself.
To be perfectly honest I have to admit that sometimes I wonder how I'm coming across to others and realize it's probably not in the best light. It wouldn't be the first and I doubt it will be the last somebody would read my words, or listen to me talk and think I am one way or another that isn't necessarily the truth.
Does one moment or a few sprinkled moments together encapsulate who a person is? Am I many different persons depending on who you ask? To truly know someone you would have to know what they know all day, all night, every moment of everyday. And be able to make sense of it.
In the end most people are determined to think of you in the way that they will. Sometimes I believe there isn't anything you can do to make some people like you. They're determined to find fault with you. I think I have been that way about some people sometimes as well. But it makes me feel somewhat frustrated to realize that I can be 99.9% perfect and even that isn't good enough.
It's life though. Life is very unforgiving. No matter your effort you're still damned to be human. The futile game of bettering yourself. I used to think I knew why I was trying to be a better person. Now I know I didn't. It's not about making God proud of me, it's about the other people in life that we are living together with. Everyone is connected. If I am unforgiving of you, I am in essence unforgiving of myself and vice versa.
So, today I thought to myself... to be kind to myself and others. By challenging people's sincerity less.
Maybe you really do mean to be careful and just appear to be really careless with other's feelings? I hope so.
Blogs aren't about sounding just right. They're not about fitting in with what people expect of you, or about having "social graces", they're just about being honest with yourself and allowing other people some insight into your thought processes. And even now explaining this I'm talking to myself.
I don't know about everyone else, I just know about me. Everyone has their reasons or explanations for why they do things they way they do, or feel the way they do; some might even call them excuses. And I have mine. I'm not always very aware of the why's, for myself.
To be perfectly honest I have to admit that sometimes I wonder how I'm coming across to others and realize it's probably not in the best light. It wouldn't be the first and I doubt it will be the last somebody would read my words, or listen to me talk and think I am one way or another that isn't necessarily the truth.
Does one moment or a few sprinkled moments together encapsulate who a person is? Am I many different persons depending on who you ask? To truly know someone you would have to know what they know all day, all night, every moment of everyday. And be able to make sense of it.
In the end most people are determined to think of you in the way that they will. Sometimes I believe there isn't anything you can do to make some people like you. They're determined to find fault with you. I think I have been that way about some people sometimes as well. But it makes me feel somewhat frustrated to realize that I can be 99.9% perfect and even that isn't good enough.
It's life though. Life is very unforgiving. No matter your effort you're still damned to be human. The futile game of bettering yourself. I used to think I knew why I was trying to be a better person. Now I know I didn't. It's not about making God proud of me, it's about the other people in life that we are living together with. Everyone is connected. If I am unforgiving of you, I am in essence unforgiving of myself and vice versa.
So, today I thought to myself... to be kind to myself and others. By challenging people's sincerity less.
Maybe you really do mean to be careful and just appear to be really careless with other's feelings? I hope so.
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