Missing
This part of life makes you feel like you're truly missing something when you are in my position. Because of choices and because of how life turned out for me, I get to miss out on basic elements most women get the pleasure of experiencing. First, the dream wedding; that was because of a poor choice. Second, baby shower with family and friends; this I'll probably never get.
The baby shower that I did get last time, sucked. My Mother in law threw it and it was full of her friends and family, no one I knew at all. My family and friends weren't even invited. So, it was not an enjoyable thing at all and in the end I was more pissed off at her for it than anything because (naturally after being very specific on the fact that no one was to hold him but her, she passed him around the entire fricken room). So, complete failure.
Well, my sister "tried" an online baby shower... but I got nothing from it except for a few well wishers. Not that I was expecting gifts from these people even though I'd known them my entire life, I didn't even get any cards.
I do not mean to sound ungrateful. It just sucks that because of my parents moving me here thousands of miles away from friends and family, I tried to remake those bonds in adulthood which didn't work. Just haven't found that same connection, you know, people that have known you your entire life? I don't know anyone that has known me my entire life that lives even remotely in the same time zone as me.
It's disappointing. Disappointing because I see all these women that get the benefit of those moments in life and I feel left out and like without meaning to, I'm missing out on big things that should be every womans right in life to experience.
Sucks. I guess I'm just out of the ordinary in more than one way in life. I kind of always felt like my life always turned out to be going in a direction that left me alone in some element or another. And this is just one more way that I have to challenge myself to be ok.
The baby shower that I did get last time, sucked. My Mother in law threw it and it was full of her friends and family, no one I knew at all. My family and friends weren't even invited. So, it was not an enjoyable thing at all and in the end I was more pissed off at her for it than anything because (naturally after being very specific on the fact that no one was to hold him but her, she passed him around the entire fricken room). So, complete failure.
Well, my sister "tried" an online baby shower... but I got nothing from it except for a few well wishers. Not that I was expecting gifts from these people even though I'd known them my entire life, I didn't even get any cards.
I do not mean to sound ungrateful. It just sucks that because of my parents moving me here thousands of miles away from friends and family, I tried to remake those bonds in adulthood which didn't work. Just haven't found that same connection, you know, people that have known you your entire life? I don't know anyone that has known me my entire life that lives even remotely in the same time zone as me.
It's disappointing. Disappointing because I see all these women that get the benefit of those moments in life and I feel left out and like without meaning to, I'm missing out on big things that should be every womans right in life to experience.
Sucks. I guess I'm just out of the ordinary in more than one way in life. I kind of always felt like my life always turned out to be going in a direction that left me alone in some element or another. And this is just one more way that I have to challenge myself to be ok.
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