Change Ourselves


I recently had a conversation about divorce with a friend and it got me thinking about the amount of control we have in life. Some of the most complicated and life changing situations are when they involve the change that comes from someone else's actions, they affect our lives and we're left reeling sometimes trying to cope. 

It isn't fair how selfish people usually come into your life like a whirlwind and rip up your neatly planted garden, your safe haven. We can all be selfish, but I think we know the type of people we're talking about. The ones who live solely for themselves. When they make decisions they don't take into account the amount of turmoil they're causing everyone else in their life, they just do it because they think it will make them happy. 

But aren't our lives supposed to be about making others happy? I know everyone wants to follow their bliss. Everyone wants to lead a life that is fulfilled. No one wants to wake up and say I wish I had done this. But normally when you live a selfish life that's exactly what happens. 

I picture this old person sitting on their porch watching their neighbors children play resentfully, because they're alone. They didn't invest anything in other people, only in themselves, so in the end all they have is themselves. The big problem here is that when we invest in others we invest in ourselves, but those investments never come back void. When we're so focused on making ourselves happy that's when we're the most unhappy. 

I like to imagine forgetting about yourself at least momentarily is the happiest you can be. There is an fine line between neglect and just putting others first. It doesn't mean you don't matter, but you must consider others

"…2make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. 3Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves;4do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others." Philippians 2:4 
Make my joy complete. That sounds like something I would ask for.

We live in a world surrounded by other people and most are not looking out for the interest of others, it is humanity, but we can't control how others treat us. 

How can we survive in those moments of chaos and strife? We must remember that they don't control life either, God can make every bad situation work out for good no matter the intentions people had if you are trusting in Him and believe that He has the best intentions in life for you. 

"For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble; he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will lift me high upon a rock." Psalm 27:5

And in everything 


I know everyone uses that scripture verse, but I kid you not I have had some serious dark times in my life and I have a plaque of this up in my bathroom and everytime I sit in my bathroom I read it and I immediately felt better knowing the Master of the Universe intended my future to be prosperous and He would never harm me. 

Focus on that. We must change the way we think in bad times. Think on these things instead...

"8Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. 9The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:8









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